Belated Gratitude

I'm not a huge fan of Valentine's day - sure, it's a cute little holiday that allows us shower our loved ones with extra affection (all the while putting a larger dent into our not-so-recovered-from-Christmas finances...) but hey, at least the folks down at Hallmark are enjoying themselves. I'm half-kidding, I don't want anybody to get the impression that I'm a Scrooge about it – I do my part and purchase cards and chocolate and flowers, but in analyzing the holiday as a whole, I really think some people know how to take a cute little holiday and fill it with a whole lot of pressure to do/buy/say all the right love things in one day. I think that’s why our little family had a hard night on the 14th. Two of us were tired and cranky, one of us was 2-year old cranky and the other couldn’t stop reminding the rest of us how important it was to be nice on Valentine’s Day… of course, that was my Andy. He really did a great job of keeping the rest of us from creating any permanent damage. He’s a really great person and I truly am glad he's mine.

Which brings me to the point of inspiration for my post. I work in a law firm that dabbles in all areas of law. We do contractural work, we do litigation, we do corporate work, probate and wills. I get a call the other day from a gal who wants to come in and talk about a will with a specific attorney in our office. She shows up today for her appointment and I raise a half an eyebrow because she's quite young (30's I would say) - not that it's uncommon for this age to talk wills, but there was something about her that stirred compassion and sadness. While she was waiting for her appointment, I couldn't help but overhear her on a cell phone conversation saying something to the affect of "...I'm not sure about that - we'll just have to wait and see. I suppose I'll have to call work and take a few more weeks off to take care of things..." (Is she sick?) (Is she okay?) My mind came up with all sorts of illnesses this poor girl could have.

After her appointment, I was given her paperwork and the lawyer who met with her tells me her husband had just died a week ago. I don't even know this woman, but I'm in disbelief - she's too young to be a widow! Evidentally, he suffered from a heart attack at the age of 40.

I'm not posting this to promote fear in the lives of you wives out there, but what a reminder it was for me to realize that the love of my life is exactly that. I tend to be an independent thinker and sometimes I believe that gets in the way of my feelings for others, namely, my husband of nearly 9 years (and companion for many). I find myself held up in my own thoughts and while I know sometimes it's because of the whole mom thing, I fail to connect with Andy as often as I would like to. I don't want to some day, whether it be in 10 or 40 years, decide that I should have soaked it all in more.

Sure, I'll probably need future reminders, but I think it's time I start dishing out my feelings of gratitude for Andy TO Andy. Whether it be in the occassional card or just a passing comment, I see no reason to not spoil him just as much as I do my children.